Monday 3.30.2009

Back to school breakfast. Ian started with toast and then moved on to Gogurt. Connor had Frosted Flakes.

Connor's lunch - water, pretzel rods, string cheese, and Cool Ranch Doritos. I forgot to include dessert (i.e. Crazy Feet).


My lunch - Trader Joe's mac & cheese from a box. Nine times out of ten, I prefer boxed mac & cheese to homemade. It's quick and easy and yummy. I have fond childhood memories of my grandmother letting me have boxed mac & cheese for breakfast. Trader Joe's boxed mac & cheese is superior to Kraft in a couple of ways - 1) It tastes better. The noodles are better quality and the cheese is sharper. 2) You don't need to add butter.


Connor's dinner - "Butter" noodles. He doesn't use real butter, though. He uses Smart Balance. I have suggested to him that he would enjoy his pasta more with real butter and grated parmesan cheese, but he refuses to even try it that way.


On to dinner - grilled chicken salad. This is about as healthy of a dinner as you'll see on here... Organic lettuce, fresh grilled chicken, and locally grown tomatoes.

Here's my salad, as described above and with shaved asiago cheese on top and parmesan peppercorn dressing on the side.

Here is Tony right after he asked "Where's the shredded mozzerella cheese?".... Hummmmm, just a guess but if it's not on the counter... it is probably.... IN THE FRIDGE. DID YOU THINK TO LOOK THERE BEFORE YOU ASKED A QUESTION THAT YOU KNEW THE ANSWER TO? But, I digress... I had to leave the kitchen right after I took this picture for fear of seeing Tony ruining his salad by topping it with canned Chow Mein noodles or crushed crackers and pepperoni.

Here's Ian, the business man. Last night he loaded his wagon with a dozen bottles of Gatorade, a big bag of Goldfish crackers, and a bag of tortilla chips. He then walked up and down the driveway selling his items to Tony, Connor, and me. We all finally gave up some change and Ian was happy. Pocket change doesn't sound like much compensation for his work until you remember that it's 100% profit. I paid for those groceries and he somehow made money off of me for them. Genius!

Not food related, but I wanted to post this picture anyway. Both Connor and Shadow were awake shortly before this picture was taken. I have a few questions... 1) Why would Shadow use Connor's head for a pillow when there were many other real pillows nearby? 2) Why would Connor allow the dog to sleep on his head? 3) How the hell can the two of them sleep like this?

Lazy Sunday - 3.29.2009

The kids had Popsicles and Tim Bits for breakfast.

After breakfast, Ian and I made a trip to Sam's Club.
I am sure that you are dying to know what we bought at Sam's, so here's a picture.

1. Moist & Meaty dog food
2. Gatorade
3. Coke Zero
4. 2 loaves of whole wheat bread
5. Toilet Paper
6. Paper Towels
7. 3 dozen eggs
8. A huge box of Gogurt
9. 15 pounds of baking potatoes
10. A bag of tortilla chips that weighs almost as much as Ian does
11. Prosciutto
    
12. 3 pounds of bacon
    
13. 3 boxes of Capri Sun
14. Farm Rich Mozzarella Bites, which are essentially like little pieces of pizza crust with cheese on the inside. Samples of this item were being given out while we were shopping. Ian ate 2 pieces and asked to buy a box of them for later, so I obliged.
15. Ham & Turkey lunch meat
16. A new backpack for Tony, to replace the one that was stolen from his car this weekend
    

Then it was off to the movies. We saw Monsters Versus Aliens in 3D. The kids loved the movie, and I liked it too. Rainn Wilson, Seth Rogen, and Will Arnett voiced three of the main characters and did a great job. I can't stand Reese Witherspoon, but I was able to block out the fact that she voiced the lead role and enjoyed the movie despite her.

Ian is still doing that weird hand gesture in every picture that I take of him.


We shared a large tub of popcorn. Connor took advantage of the free refill that comes with the purchase of a $6.25 tub of popcorn shortly before the movie ended.


And dinner... Pizza from Minute Man.

Okay, so we ate out a lot this weekend... I'll be cooking meals at home all week to make up for it.

The Skyline Pictures from 3.27.2009

Many thanks to Tony for taking pictures of his lunch date with Connor on Friday!

Connor and Tony had gone ice skating right before lunch. Connor refused to eat his breakfast and was hungry, tired, and mean by the time he got to Skyline. Connor has a 3 way and a Skyliner without the hot dog.

One of Tony's things in the world is fountain Mountain Dew. Looks like he is eating a 4 Way and 2 Skyliners with his Dew.

The Stewarts Versus Food! 3.28.2009

I'll start today's blog update with a big FUCK YOU to whoever stole a bunch of stuff out of Tony's car on Friday night/Saturday morning. They took his backpack, Ipod, my camera, the Sirius radio, cash, and about 10 Truth For Sanity cds. They also stole Tony's new U2 CD. Not only is this person an ASSHOLE, but they also have shitty taste in music. I wouldn't wish a U2 CD on my worst enemy.

I'm not one to sit around and be pissy over something that I can't change, so our day had to go on.

Breakfast... Eggs over easy and dry toast. I ate half of the toast before I broke down and put some Smart Balance on it.

Lunch... Campbell's Heathy Request Chicken and Noodle Soup. Once the soup was thoroughly peppered and salted, it was pretty good (for canned soup).

Now for the big show! As I've posted before, we love the show Man Versus Food. We watched 3 episodes of Man Versus Food on Thursday night and decided that we should have a food challenge at some point over the weekend.

LOCATION: Rooster's on Henderson Road
PARTICIPANTS: Tony, Michelle, Connor, and Ian
BYSTANDERS: My mom and Stepdad
THE CHALLANGE: Pick your preferred type of chicken and the hottest sauce that you can tolerate. Eat all of your chicken. After you are finished eating, you are not permitted to wipe your face or hands with a napkin, take a drink, or leave the table for 5 minutes.

Tony picked bone-in wings with Donkey sauce (the 3rd hottest sauce available). Connor had 5 bone-in wings with medium sauce and a side of Donkey. I (the only TRUE competitor) had grilled chicken fingers with Killer sauce. Ian's challenged himself to do whatever the hell he wanted and eat only as much as he felt like. He had two boneless chicken fingers without sauce and a Diet Coke.


I don't consider Donkey sauce to be a challenge, but Tony's palate isn't as used to spice as mine is.

I should have gotten Super Killer sauce. I did sweat a bit while I ate mine, but it wasn't really a challenge. I have a very high tolerance for spicy foods.

Ian immediately declared himself the winner after one sip of soda and half of a chicken finger. My mom asked him why he's always making crazy hand gestures and he flatly replied "Because it makes me so super happy. Duh."

Ian finished his meal with a gum ball. He wanted everyone to know that blue gum balls turn your tongue blue!

AND THE WINNERS ARE: Connor and Michelle! Tony finished his wings but was immediately disqualified for using his napkin, taking a drink of beer, and going to the restroom. Ian was also declared a winner for his charming ways even though he failed to finish anything that he ordered.

Connor, Ian, and Michelle won! Tony Lost! HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA!

My mom had Teriyaki chicken fingers, which are the most mild available, because she is a big girl-baby likes Teriyaki. My stepdad had 5 medium wings and a "all the meats" pizza. Unfortunately, the pictures of my mom's food didn't turn out.

And just for fun, here's a picture of our late night snack!

Friday - 3.27.2009

Friday was a fun day. The day started with donuts, which both kids asked for but neither ate.

In the afternoon, Tony took Connor ice skating and to Skyline. Tony promised me a picture of their lunch but never hasn't sent it to me. Connor is obsessed with Skyline and will eat there as often as we let him. He had a coney dog, but took the dog off and didn't eat it, and a kid's three way.


I was in a bit of a holding pattern for work, waiting for some updates to be made so that I could test the new game/software that we are developing, so I took Ian to see Yes Man. He had popcorn with extra butter and a Diet Coke (okay, I drank almost all of the Diet Coke). Yes Man was very funny. It started Jim Carrey being the "old Jim Carrey" - lots of slapstick and physical comedy. It co-starred the guy who plays Murray on Flight of the Conchords, one of the stoner dudes from That 70's Show, and Bradley Cooper (who I have a huge crush on). All in all, it was a good cast and a good movie. Definitely worth renting when it comes out on DVD.

After the movie, I took Ian to McDonald's for a Happy Meal and to play on the playground. I don't know why he is crossing his arms and making weird hand gestures in most of the pictures that I've taken of him recently. It probably has something to do with the fact that he thinks that he's a super-powered ninja hero. That's just a guess though. Ian didn't eat even one bite of his Happy Meal but he had fun on the playground.


Here's Tony with one of his favorite things in the entire world - Scottish Ale from Barley's in Grandview. You are able to buy draft beer by the jug there and it stays fresh for two days. Tony swears that the male bartender that works there is out to get him because he always screws on the lid on his jug too tight. See those plyers next to Tony's hand and glass? Tony had to use those to unscrew the lid on his beer. If only I had gotten a picture of that....




Later in the evening, I went out to dinner with sister and brother-in-law. They wanted Greek food so we headed out to The Big Fat Greek Kuzina in Upper Arlington. Tony's tolerance for Greek food is much lower than mine and he looked at me like I had two heads when I asked him he wanted to go with us. He elected to stay home and get a sub from Donato's. You can take the boy out of Indiana but you can't change all of the "traditional" eating habits that he was raised with. Connor elected to stay home and play video games and Ian stayed home to work on his manifesto and build a pipe bomb. Stacey had a chicken pita and David had a traditional pita. You can't tell from the picture, but the pitas are served wrapped in foil that is shaped to look like a swan. I found this very amusing. But that's probably because I am easily amused.

Fried feta cheese appitizer. It was very tasty.

David ordered a Greek beer that he said was awful. He's a trooper and drank it anyway. He did better with the Efes Dark that he ordered next. Stacey and I ordered vodka martinis with pomegranate. I our waitress instead brought us two glasses of cold red wine that tasted like shit. We eventually got the right drinks, but this was the first of many annoying things that our waitress did. She was also kind enough to correct our pronunciation on about 10 Greek words that we very slightly said incorrectly.

I had grilled chicken on rice with lettuce and tomatoes, with a couple of falafels thrown in just for fun. Good stuff.

The best part of dinner was when a woman sitting behind us sent her glass of wine back because it wasn't full enough. It looked like they took it back to the kitchen to fill up and not up to the bar. I hope that the woman enjoyed drinking out of a glass that the kitchen staff most likely licked before bringing it back out to her and eating a meal that they may have spat on. For the record, the glass of wine was properly filled to begin with. I drink enough wine that I know what a full glass looks like.

This is How We Roll - 3.26.2009

Ian starts his day shirtless and with a chocolate ice cream cone. Why? Because he can, that's why. (note: Ian is on the small side and is on a doctor order high fat, high calorie diet. Otherwise I would really rather he wait until lunch to eat ice cream).

That's a tent in the background. It's spring break and the kids have been camping in a tent in the living room.


My kids and I are all big fans of salty carbs in almost any form. Popcorn is a staple in our house. Connor started his day with a snack instead of his normal bowl of cereal. This is fresh popped white popcorn with sea salt, not that crap that you pop in the microwave.






Despite Wednesday's fiasco at Kroger, I decided to take the kids to Target today to pick up some odds and ends. The kids enjoy the fine foods at the Target cafe and each got a pretzel before we headed home. I can't believe that I am about to type this, but Connor actually looks like Tony in this picture. Connor is my mini-me but he really resembles his dad in this picture. He must have gotten his snarl from Tony.


Here's our dog Shadow. He's waiting patiently for his dinner of Moist N' Meaty and grilled chicken. He's a 5 year old beagle mix and we adopted him from a shelter about 6 weeks ago. He is BY FAR the best behaved member of the Stewart family.



Here's Tony's dinner - wavy potato chips with French onion dip. Please note that the mess in the background is an air mattress and blankets. The kids decided to camp on the air mattress instead of in the tent last night.


Connor eats uncooked cookie dough on an almost daily basis, and that's yet another reason that I shop at Sam's Club. They sell the biggest bucket of cookie dough that I've ever seen. Connor asked for cookie dough last night and I was surpised to discover that a spoon was already in the container when I opened it. When I asked Connor why there was a spoon inside the cookie dough, he said "I'm just trying to save some time. Go ahead and leave it in there for next time, okay?" I guess he's.... um... being innovative. For the record, I did NOT leave the spoon in there. (For those who are worried about food bourne illnesses, please don't let my kid's consumption of uncooked cookie dough concern you. The eggs in the cookie dough are pasturized)

Spring Break, Evening 3. The Kids Have Won and I am Defeated. 3.25.2009

I give up. The kids have won. They've worn me out. It's chaos in this house and I am counting the days until they go back to school next week.

I took the kids to the grocery store with me yesterday and that is what finally broke me. Connor and Ian are exhausting to shop with - physically and mentally. They insisted on riding in the grocery cart that has the car attached to the front. Connor is too damn big to be riding in the car grocery cart but he managed to wedge himself in next to Ian. They then proceeded to argue the entire time while I pushed 93 pounds of kids around Kroger - plus the additional weight of the cart itself and the cart full of groceries. About 15 minutes in to our shopping trip, I just gave in to almost all of their demands. Ian wants a baguette - Fine. Connor wants little ice cream cups - Fine. Starburst? FINE. Nerds Rope? FINE? Popsicles? JUST PUT THEM IN THE CART. Two kinds of Krispy Kreme Donuts? YES, BUT ONLY IF YOU QUIT FIGHTING WITH YOUR BROTHER. By the time we were checking out, I was a sweaty and tired mess.

Here are the results...

When Ian asked for a baguette, he had no intention of letting me slice it for him or of sharing it. While I was carrying the other groceries in, he found the baguette and started eating it whole. I cannot explain what goes on in Ian's head.



The kids have set up residence in a tent in the living room. Here is Ian with his bread and Connor has just finished his ice cream and is eating his Nerds Rope.






Ian with his first of about 5 popsicles. Connor had about 3 popsicles.


Connor battles my cousin, Olivia, for a bag of Krispy Kreme donuts. It was a win/win situation. She got the glazed donuts and he got the bag of powdered donuts.






After spending an hour and $166 at the grocery store, what did I make for dinner? Nothing! We got take out from the new Middle Eastern place down the street, Pita Hut-N-Grille. Goofy name, but the food was great. I had chicken kabobs, falafel, and hummus. Tony had a shwarma pita and french fries. Olivia had the falafel pita. What I loved about this place is that everything is made fresh to order. I watched them roast my chicken and shape and cook the falafel. Another huge bonus is that this place is cheap!

Spring Break Day 3 - Trip to Ten Pin Bowley Alley 3.25.2009

My kids are maniacs at home but are *always* very well behaved at school. Like most elementary schools, theirs uses a color system to track good and not-so-good behavior. My kids are always on Green, the color for good behavior. They've never once been on a orange, red, or blue warning. As a result of their good behavior at school, they each earned a gift certificate for a free hour of bowling at Ten Pin Alley & Spikes in Hilliard. I figured that since it was raining today, bowling would be a good way for them to burn off some energy. Although they are well behaved at school, they are raving lunatics at home so I need all the help I can get in keeping them entertained and occupied. Ten Pin Alley is really nice bowling alley - clean, nice lanes, and great food. They even have an executive chef, unlike every other bowling alley in Columbus.

Let's start with a picture of Ian. He doesn't so much roll his bowling ball as he throws it as far as he can and it slowly makes its way to the pins. His technique is unusual but effective. He got a strike today! Here he is in celebration mode as he does a victory dance and sings "Yeah, Ian! Go, Ian!"




Here's Connor. Don't let this picture fool you, he's actually a very cute kid. He got a few spares but spent the entire time being pissy because his brother got a strike and he didn't.


Now... The food! I really like the pizza at Ten Pin. They use fresh dough, good cheese, and good sauce. Ian ordered chicken fingers and fries and took one bite and refused to touch them again. Connor ate the fries and Shadow (my dog) had the chicken when we got home. Unfortunately, it was a little too early to have a beer. Equally as unfortunate was the fact that I couldn't bowl. I love bowling but I highly suspect that bowling is what caused me to slip a couple of discs that I had to have surgically correct 2 months ago... So, now more bowling for me. But the kids had a blast!