Saturday - 4.18.2009. P.S. Don't See The Movie Adventureland

I don't know what my problem is. First I bought the Laughing Cow low fat "swiss flavored" cheese, and it was awful. Next, I bought low calorie/low fat Brie at Trader Joe's. Guess what? It sucked. It wasn't as bad as the Laughing Cow fiasco, but it wasn't good either.

In the afternoon, I went to the Movie Tavern in Hilliard and saw Adventureland. Two upsides to The Movie Tavern - they serve "real" food and they have a full service bar. Score! I had an order of Southwestern egg rolls. Yummy!

This is a blue margarita that contains 99% drink mixer and 1% tequila. I could have beer bonged 15 of these and still not have been slightly tipsy. That's my cousin, Olivia, posing with my drink.

I'm going to stray from the primary topic of food to discuss the movie we saw. I could probably write pages about all of the reasons that I disliked the movie Adventureland, but I don't care to relive the experience in that great of detail. I'll just list out my issues with the movie instead:

1. It wasn't a funny movie, despite being billed as a comedy
2. Kristen Stewart (from Twilight) is almost unwatchable. She doesn't act, she just pouts and acts pissy. She's not hot enough to get away with not being able to act while starring in a movie.
   
3. The male lead, Jesse Eisenberg, was almost as unlikeable as his female costar. I think that he was trying to pull of the geekyness and charm of Michael Cera but he just came off as annoying.
4. WARNING: SPOILERS TO FOLLOW! Em (Kristen Stewart's character) is sleeping with Ryan Reynold's character in the movie, but he's married so it's all on the down-low. Why would anyone who could sleep with someone as hot as Ryan Reynolds also be dating the annoying geek character?
5. I love Ryan Reyonlds. That's no secret. But he was horribly miscast in this movie. He was supposed to be the sleazy, older, slacker guy who is too old to be working at an amusement park and sleeping with college aged girls. Ethan Hawke would have been perfect for this role, but Ryan Reynolds just doesn't come off as sleazy or creepy.
   
6. There was too much teenage angst in this movie - especially considering that all of the characters were college aged, recent college graduates, or older.
7. WHY, in a movie full of characters who are 22+ years old, does no one have a car or their own apartment? Only one character in this movie had her own car and everyone lived with their parents.
   
8. In summary - don't waste your money seeing this movie in the theatre. Don't waste your money buying the DVD. Don't even rent the DVD. I won't even watch this again on cable TV.

P.S. Kristin Wigg and Bill Hader were fucking hilarious in this movie. I would have loved this movie if it was only about their characters. They played the wacky couple that owned the theme park. Better yet, if this movie had been boiled down to a 2 minute SNL skit about their characters it would have been genius!